I did not have bridesmaids at my own wedding. I just wanted my sister to stand next to me. I thought this was a very simple logistical decision. I quickly learned that skipping a tradition makes people deeply uncomfortable.
My friends were fine with it. The problem was my extended family. An aunt pulled me aside at a holiday dinner and asked who was going to hold my dress when I went to the bathroom. She looked genuinely distressed. She acted like I was walking into the woods alone without a survival kit.
People project their own expectations onto your event. If they had six bridesmaids in matching satin dresses in nineteen ninety, they believe that is the only way a marriage becomes legally binding. When you do something differently, they feel a strange need to correct you.
You will hear a lot of unsolicited opinions about the traditions you choose to drop. Someone will be upset that you are not doing a bouquet toss. Someone else will be horrified that you do not want a massive tiered cake. They will tell you that you are going to regret it.
You have to practice giving a very flat response.
I used to over-explain myself. I would list all the reasons why a large bridal party felt overwhelming to me. I would talk about the cost of dresses and the logistical nightmare of hair appointments. I thought if I just gave them enough facts, they would understand my side.
This was a huge mistake. Explaining yourself just invites people to argue with your logic. It turns a personal decision into a public debate. It makes them think they have a vote in the matter.
Now I just smile and give a completely empty answer. I say that we are keeping things simple and we are very happy with the plan. I do not elaborate. I let the silence hang in the air.
It is incredibly hard to do this the first few times. Your instinct is to smooth things over and make the other person happy. You have to fight that instinct.
It is not your job to make your relatives comfortable with your choices. It is your job to plan an event that you actually want to attend. Let them be mildly annoyed. They will survive without catching a bouquet.